Break

Taking a break for a week or so. In the middle of moving. I will probably be back to normal posting on Sept 3rd. Thank you for understanding ❤️

I will probably post sporadically from now until the 3rd. I will keep y’all posted

Weakness

It’s like talking to a wall.

I can’t think straight

and my brain

gets all

foggy.

I get emotional

which I have learned from you

is a weakness.

Asking for help

another weakness.

Knowing my limits

another weakness.

I use to be able to talk to you about anything,

but now I am just gonna focus on the weather.

Physical pain

I had a dream last night that I overcome the dentist.

I had to take two anxiety pills to get there but I did it.

When I woke up this morning I felt like the matrix had turn my life to slow.

I feel like maybe last night I did wake up and take two anxiety pills

because I am foggy in the mind.

I did nothing today but lay in bed and watch Jenna Marbles videos.

I’m hoping that my self care plan helps but

I am not hopeful.

I am in physical pain

feeling like a I am carrying a dumbbell on my back

that is draging in the sand.

Today I took a shower

It’s been the first time I have washed my hair myself in months

I get overwhelmed and then go to the salon to have them deal because I can’t.

I took a shower today

because my friend was coming over

and something in me snapped.

I am nasty and I smell.

just shower.

I wish I could say I shower often

but my depression sticks to me like mold that I don’t bother to wash off

because I know it grows back quickly.

Songs

I hate it when a song gets stuck in my head.

It plays on repeat until I’m blue in the face.

I can’t think about anything other than the lyrics.

My brain starts singing with out warning

and I start to think I am going crazy.

 

That is what depression is like.

It comes up at the most inconvenient times

Paralyzing you

knowing that it is in control.